Search engines, those ubiquitous web sites that allow
novice and expert to find whatever is they want and desire, are to the web
what Want Ads and similar classified
papers are to print publishing. Your hands get dirty quickly. You want a
parakeet that announces to visitors "Fuck you," or a '58 Chevy
in near mint condition, or a Russian bride you can find it in those papers.
With Alta Vista, Lycos, HotBot
et al, type the word "shit" and you will most likely get a
return of several thousand entries. Type any word and a deluge of information
fills your screen. Scroll down, then click "next." The information
keeps coming at you. What is an idle web watcher to do?
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First, avoid search engines as much you can. Every
advertiser venturing into the web knows that inevitably you will find yourself
typing in some word that only you think is important. They are betting on
it. While advertising revenue declines at the once giant revenue generators
such as HotWired, Pathfinder and Slate,
revenues are climbing at Lycos,
Yahoo! and Excite.
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Second, figure it out yourself. If you know that
Widgets, Inc. has a web site then it's probably
not a long shot that their URL is either www.widgets.com, or www.widgetsinc.com. Try it. If this
does not work, then use a search engine. But know what you are getting into.
In Alta Vista if
you type "Widgets" hundreds of returns mention the company from
press releases to financial reports. One out of those many may be its web
site.
I typed "fuck" in Alta
Vista, Excite, HotBot, Magellan and Lycos. They returned 40000, 67372, 90863, 2530 and 17224 entries
respectively. Interestingly, Excite and Lycos tailored their banner ads to the search results, featuring
ads for XXX sites. |
If these search engines are such a pain, then why bother
with them? And, more important, why are they such cash cows? People are
stupid. Almost every person I know who just recently purchased a computer
feels hinky about them. They're afraid. They settle for that first disk
from AOL. A search engine is a
comfortable starting point. Normally, in life, these people use 6% of their
brain. They are smart and educated with decent jobs. But when they sit in
front of that monitor their brain usage drops to half of normal. Who wants
to think after getting home from work? What everyone wants is television.
But they don't want to be passive viewers. So they strike out into the World
Wide Web for a deeper, richer electronic experience. What they find is mostly
incomprehensible. They retreat to that desire for passivity. Search engines
promise it. They are like the cable guide channel. Type a word and all my
choices and answers are given to me. Wrong.
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All is not bad in the search engine world. If you want
to research a subject, typing that subject in any one of the engines will
most likely satisfy your quest. Likewise, if you are sitting at home and
desire sex, then typing "fuck"
will get you thousands of responses. Most of them will ask for
money to view naked people, but some are outright ridiculous.
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Michael McInnis,
founder and principal of Primal Publishing,
designs web sites, publishes short
story booklets and writes daily, with Lauren Leja, 9and2
a list of what's pretty good and what's pretty shabby. |
